i’m an adult (even if i’m of a younger generation), gedddit?

i don’t understand why elders  (distant relatives kind) expect u do stuff even when its obvious u dont really want to do it?

N i dont mean things like responsibility or etc.

I mean like DOING CHORES FOR them( at the expense of ur own time), lending them personal items(which u SERIOUSLY dun wanna to)…

so what if u are older? I mean I’m 20! I have my own life. I have my own privacy. How can I lend u things that contains my personal stuff?! N they juz dun geddit.

F**k. THE MOST IRRITATING THING IS, I have to. Because I dont have the bloody courage to tell them, I DONT WANT TO. Cuz I dont have excuses this time round. Cuz I dont want to put my mum in a difficult position. Cuz I know that some point in time, I may need their help.

N THE MOST PISSING PART IS …yea, they NEED IT. SO BADLY they cant wait tomorrow. NO. Now at 11.05 pm, they want it, and THAT thing HAS to be there. My poor bro (have to do it for me cuz I dont drive) ,and he has work early next morning , he as to do it cuz my mum is asleep. NNNN they have the guts to say it over the phone in a irritable tone that it is my fault that I didnt bring it earlier. Y dont they just f*cking scram.

I’m super duper pissed. A**holeS

Life is defined not only by opportunities taken, but opportunities missed

Hello rusty blog…

more updates. In fact I think there is too much to be typed out. N I’m not sure whether my patience will last me to type out every single thing that has change me during these mths. But not wasting anymore time, let’s get things started…

First, my this semester is NOT only filled by my trainings, but endless projects and assignments, tests and the usual academic stuff. However, workload is considerably heavier compared to my previous semester. As my econs modules getting more specific into certain area of studies, like environmental economics, my interest towards my major is beginning to increase too. However, I dont think I can say I’m super confident about my finals. Heavier workload, heavier trainings, I really feel like dying trying to juggle both. Trainings have increased, not only frequency (everyday), but also the intensity.

Leading me to my next major decision, I decided to leave the team, and focus on my studies 100%. In fact, my official “departure” has just taken effect starting from yesterday. It was a sad departure, afterall, I really wished to be able to continue rowing, especially for June race, for PM cup. In addition, they do not really have enough rowers, or backpacks (I’m one). I also feel a bit “wasted” for me because I’ve just make it into the IVP crew during regatta. The opportunity and trust given….it seem a bit ungrateful of me to just quit. However, I’ve decided that 100% on my studies is what I come to NUS for, there is no point in winning medals at the expense of my grades. Hence, I harden my resolve. I’m really sorry for things to turn out like that, but it has been a really really really tiring semester for me. I wouldn’t wish to go through it again. Studies comes first afterall.

Another most happening thing is, I’ve run my first marathon! OK, fine, I run only 32.5 km of it. The overall timing is 6 hrs and a few minutes. Quite bad. But I stll need to complment myself! (: Hahs, since before this marathon, I’ve been mugging before exams, and totally no running for me (for 3 wks) since I do not have sufficient time for revision….Despite not running for 3 weeks, I manage to clock the first 21km within 2h 30 min, and clock 32km in 4 hours. However, lets just call a series of unfortunate events, my leg begins to cramp really bad, and i have to limp my way back for the last 10km. N WHAT AN AGONISING 10km! Hot sun, cramp legs, and the thought that I could not complete my first marathon in 5 h 30 mins (my goal). Ultimate siansations. N after the race, my legs hurts so bad that I dont even bother looking around the booths of the race site and get those freebies, I just grab the finisher tee, medal, 100 plus and off I go to collect my bag. THAT is how shag I am. When I got home, I realise one of my toenail drop off. :/ Lesson learnt: Better train for a marathon if u decided to go for one. But actually in the first place, I didnt expect my mugging to be so intensive that I could not even squeeze out a run. But ohwells, at least I completed it! So, one life goal (that is complete a marathon b4 I turn 21) down ! HAHS.

As for these days, due to my toe nail dropping off, walking has been a problem, needless to say, running/jogging is out of the question. Been munching tibits while watching shows/facebooking/surfing net for temp jobs (but super hard!). Feeling super unhealthy, despite having just ran a marathon. Ohwells hope I can recover soon. It has been restricting my movement and activities. Which kinda aid in my emo-ing about leaving the team. Haii, hope by the time next semester starts, I’ll be alright.

Anw, I think elvin ng is really cute. LOL, i KNOW THIS PART IS RANDOM. But I just watched the 9pm show and I think he acted the role of Tarzan quite well. Silly and cute. hahs, hope he can churn out more shows in the future. My mum thinks Dai Yangtian is better, but I prefer Elvin Ng. Hahs, DYT is good, but I just think he is restricted to “period” dramas, like little nyonya and now the Tgt show. Elvin is more versatile…=D

Hope more GOOD dramas can come out, I’m kinda bored staying at home with the constant reminder from my mum to help her clean the house :/

shall end here. nights!

I feel stupid.

):

I dont even feel excitement for tmr’s race.
has the novelty worn off? or am i just PMSing?

My grumbles

read the title.
N its worse when u have sucky grp memberS!
roll eyes. the worst thing? they added me on facebook. N I CANT EVEN COMPLAIN ONLINE TO MY OTHER FRIENDS.
_________________________________________________

I’m so tired. Physically and mentally. Remind me again. Why am I doing this to myself?

Its not june race, and my trainings are crazy. Cn i survive them?
________________________________________________

There’s bound to be something undone. Something that is overdue. Something that requires my help. Who gives me help when I need them?
________________________________________________

Why can’t somebody just acknowlege its their responsibility? I only have two hands.
________________________________________________

I really hope I can have it all in the end. I don’t want to give up on any opportunities.
_________________________________________________

I can’t breathe.
3 ongoing projects.
tutorials waiting to be understood.
More trainings.
The more I want to venture out but cant.
Why?

Why some people are just pure fu*king as*holes.

now. I seldom curse in my titles. But i m freaking pissed towards a not-so-close-to-talk-to friend who suppose to supervise me in my part time work. YES. I know she is a supervisor and everything, but she should also be more tactful i think.

Scenario via handphone:
ME: eh xxx, ask u something..watz the main diff btw A and A’? can i see it as the latter is more of etc etc?
AH: pls google any ref sources, and anw is quite obvious if u see the pdf.

HMMM hello? is it very hard to type in another word yes or no in ur sms? or if it is THAT difficult, u can just ans me yes or no lei…wtf for u 2 type a long string of words? N the part “anw is quite obvious…” OH PLS. Isn’t it obvious if I ask u means its NOT obvious to me?? and did i sense a “bu nai fan” feeling here? Like what the hell, u are my “friend” after all lah~. Do u really have to put it THAT WAY? I cant believe i have to face her for another another 1 yr?! WA KAO

new theme (:

decide to change the theme of my blog. cuz getting quite sian of the bannan smoothie theme. AND anyways, new sem, new theme, so new start (: hopefully its a fantastic sem ahead.

holidays just started for me, since i’ve only ended competition about a week ago. BUT SERIOUSLY, I’m getting super bored already. In fact, how I wish I know what modules I taking next sem so that I can go and read up first. YES. THIS IS HOW SIAN I AM. haha, cuz nw my hols juz mainly consist of watching shows from net, shopping, meetups with friends…and the occasion gyms. YES, there is variety, but seriously, there is no excitement, i mean where else can u shop in sg? bugis,orchard,vivocity.ok, the only plus pt? I’m setting off to jakarta on 17th july. (: thats a plus point. but meanwhile, I’m stuck to my routine life. AND it dosen’t help that I’m broke too. so my shoppings become window shopping which limits any further anticipation towards the activity.

oh, and my trainings are really minimal these days that I really feel guilty about but dont really feel like moving my ass to change it… that is I haven’t been running for 2 mths?!  (like OMG!!!!!)  i mean since the day my toe gets injured? N even thou I can run nw, but I really dont seem like doing it. which I think i really should shoot myself, cuz I alr paid $30++ on Army half marathjon which equals 21km? N when I mean running, i mean run like min 20 mins kind? N the ave runners complete 21km in like 2h plus. I havent even clock 1/4 of the time. OH MANS. I’m goneeeeeee caseeeee!

HAII, but aft bloggin’, maybe my desire to run increase by 20%. (:

BUT it dosen’t help as

1) thunders can be heard right nw. (RAINING!= SIAN)

2)my stomach is growling now. (I going to eat = Min I can only run 2 hrs later)

N by the time these factors no longer pose a prob, I dont feel like moving again.

SEE? how my life is in such a stupiddd routine?

!@#$%^&*()_!@#$%^&*()

SIAN!

deleted. more effort.

we 4.45.72. they 4.45.42. we got 2nd. and the feelings sucks. team cried. less than a sec and we lost the pm cup. staying on to fight. vow to get the cup back next yr!

randomness ahead!!

FULL TRAINING AHEAD! with the major june race going on, and the upcoming KL race.
Training days are mon, tue, wed, thur, sat. basically 5 out of 7 days. N thats the minimum days. Isn’t that great? -_-III

not that I’m complaining about the toughness lah~*
I WANT TO WIN TGT AS A TEAM – and if these trainings are the price that I have to pay, then so be it. I hope that we really can win, u know, eso this june race, it is one of the main reason that I continue to stay in the team and endure all the sweat, blood, blisters, aches and etc.

Last sat, something bad happened thou, I think I must have strained my muscles, my whole left side of my back cramped up during Legs and Paddles (that is u row then u run then u row then u run…etc). TOTAL agony, I cant straighten my back after set 2 ended. SCARE ME TO HELL, thought my back is gonecase. Luckily, I only strain it, no perm damage. although now, my back still tends to cramp up for some sets, but it is slowly getting used to these intensive trainings….so solution, I have to kepp stretchinggg!

N I really hope that june 4 can come quickly, I cant wait to go to KL for the “putrajaya” race. (: at least its intensive trainings overseas. I will be back on 7th, then camp, then major race. URGH, let all these finish ASAP. I cant wait to slack and enjoy my hols! (:

OH, and results coming out soon. I HOPE I WONT SCREW UP MY MACRO ECONS!! N pls lemme score at least a C in genes and soc!!! LET me TRAIN in a happy mindset….

oh, another random thing, i find songs from ss501 nice!! Their songs are catchyyy (:

boys over flowers

boys over flowers rocks! i think the goo jun pyo and the yoon ji hoon is so cute!

oh but then the other 2 oso cute lah.

geez, now i’m boy crazy. LOL

but then again, it makes me wonder y the taiwan version aka meteor garden can be so sucky while the korean version is fantastic even thou is both based on the same comic??

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

OMG. I’m so freaking frustrated right now. =.=

Y cant some pple zi dong yi dian???!!!!

)&%)&(*&(^^%&*(*